Music, music, music!

After an ego boosting request to return to teaching - which was a disaster for my mental health - I have decided to stop. Once again I find myself retired. It's funny, is there such a thing? Life seems busier than it was before, time flashes past and you wonder where it has gone. Perhaps it is something to do with getting older? One thing that has blighted this year is extreme stress! Lack of sleep, huge demands on time, never ending demands for work to be done 'NOW' - and the distress when you cannot physically do it - which has caused, over the last year a huge mental impact on my wellbeing. I found myself doubting my mental abilities, fearful of the stigma of 'forgetfulness', 'old age' and worse, dementia. It has been a hard year. One area of mental health that is rarely mentioned is the healing use of music. Music where you can lose yourself. Music which helps you to relax and finally sleep, music which can help you forget your fears and failings. Mental health is not really talked about out loud. No-one likes to admit that they are failing in some way, or becoming forgetful. Unless you have experienced it, the stress when you constantly forget wears you down like being rubbed down with sandpaper. You, yourself, your worth becomes eroded leaving behind a shell of what you really are. What I would say is - listen to music. Let it envelop you, engage and bury you; sing, dance, let it lull you to sleep, let it scour off the stress of forgetfulness, and let it rebuild you. I have retired AGAIN, but this time I am making sure I rebuild my self esteem with music, rest and realising that as a retired person I am not worthless - I still have a lot to give.